My neighbor fired up his snow blower way too early on this cold Sunday morning. He's retired and gets up unhumanly early. The snow gave him something to do. Snow blower maintenance, getting gas, storage, and actual use of the blower were all tasks he treasured. If I get that way someone please shoot me. There he was at seven in the morning and heart broken. The snow plow pushed a bunch of icy black snow up into his driveway. His snow blower couldn't process it and he was forced to break out his shovel. There we were, him and I shoveling snow like cavemen without technology to bail us out. I had a big advantage over him because I was younger and in better shape. He had a big advantage because his house faced the East and the sun was out doing most of his work for him. I wonder if he picked out his house knowing it was Nebraska snow that feared the sun and the shadow-less driveway. This icy snow was in basketball sized clumps and my half broken plastic shovel did little to help. I picked them up and threw them in my yard. This was the street's snow and I shouldn't have to pick it up. The city owns the streets and if I throw my driveway snow into the street I get a ticket. The city can push the street's snow into my driveway. I issue them tickets but they never pay them.
My neighbor got done with his driveway in about an hour. He had a snow blower, sun, and his wife helping him out. There wasn't any snow left anywhere on his cement. The final touch was him busting out a broom to remove the last bits of snow the shovel missed. What an asshole. I'm just trying to get mine to a point where my wife's car won't get stuck and this guy is sweeping. I started on the sidewalk shoveling and I cracked a smile when I saw the snow plow coming by. He was headed right for the neighbor's driveway with a bunch of snow. He's going to push a shit load of ice up into his drive and the jackass is there with a broom sweeping. He must not have been able to drive too close to this guy's driveway because he veered out of the way like an infant was on the driveway. I wonder if the insanely polished clean driveway scared him away. He wasn't so nice to my side of the street and all my hard work vanished in an instant. One second the end of the drive was clear of ice and debris the next it was a winter wonderland. The plow driver waved at me and I waved back. I can't believe I did that. I should have flipped him off.
An hour later and I went in the house. I made a cup of coffee and warmed up. I looked out the bay window surveying the neighborhood. All the houses around us had absolutely no snow in their drives. It looked like god himself caused the snow to fall everywhere except the neighbor's sidewalks and driveways just like how they have the wonderful sun hitting theirs. I wondered if that snowplow driver is laughing because I waved back at him. My driveway had patches of ice and snow but my wife shouldn't have a problem getting in and out. This story will repeat itself five to ten times a year and there's no need to get angry. Next time I see that driver I'll be ready with my middle finger and that will be good enough.
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